The Perfect App…

or “Isn’t That a Familiar Tune?”

I realize that I’ve spent a lot of time in silence with myself lately, and I’ve had a little self debate about what to call this blog (I say little because I mean that in the literal sense!). I came to the conclusion that it probably is a little more self serving when it is more elusive.

As time passes, I think that the hardest part for anyone is the “growing up” phase. No matter how well we think we cope with it, ultimately, it is a super difficult thing to do because we tend to overthink and try to make life something separate from personal identity. This is not to say that we don’t grow up as ourselves; rather, I think that as humans growing up in today’s society such as it is, we tend to neglect the values which make us who we are, and act, in some ways, insincerely.

In a paper that I wrote for a seminar on the topic of personhood and the metaphysics of persons, I suggest that “what it is to be a person is just that some being has the
present or future potential to interact with the world in a morally meaningful way, and is able to make moral judgments about other interactions.” Granted, the paper itself may not be very good, the case still stands that one is a person if they can act with moral reason. This alone is an important idea, I think; we tend to say that people who kill just for shits and giggles are “monsters.” We say the same for serial killers too. Another interesting claim that people seem to make is that people who do good for amoral reasons are shallow (such as celebrities who give money to charities, and whom we judge as acting on the grounds of getting noticed). There’s a certain quality of human sincerity and moral meaningfulness that is implicit within “being human” as we might understand it, and without that we can’t really ever overcome the challenges of the “growing up” phase.

So why did I title this post “The Perfect App” and what does it have to do with anything? I got to thinking earlier that if I were an app programmer for mobile devices like the iPhone or Android, I would probably code something that allows you to talk to yourself, but not just on a surface level. After reading Paolo Coelho’s The Alchemist, I wondered what people would be like if they could talk to their hearts. Then I realized that people now have a kind of “techjoy” fixation. They can’t do anything without a cellphone in hand, or a laptop in front of them. People just don’t care to spend the time to look at their own lives and see what their hearts have to offer them. So how about an app that lets you do that?

--Just a thought for a not so rainy day.

Collectibles and Other Junk

Upon cleaning my room today (gasp! You cleaned it?!) I came across a little bit of a collector’s item; a first edition laser cel from Resident Evil 4 with the certificate of authenticity, in its original packaging. This raised an interesting question for me; what are collector’s items worth.

When it comes to collecting things, I’m curious about why people collect what they do? What kind of sentimental value an object can hold for a person seems to differ indefinitely and why it has that value is just as varied in terms of the different answers people will give. I find it somewhat neat though, when I talk to people about collections of things.

Today when I visited the Games Workshop at Scarborough Town Center, a group of teenagers came in and looked around, and I overheard them speaking with Dan, one of the staff there. They were talking about what they might be interested in getting, since their dad was a collector of miniature figures. After they left (because the stuff in the store didn’t suit their needs), I actually didn’t think too much about the scene, but I realized something about the people who usually frequent the store now that I think about it; all of the players of the various games in the franchise are collectors as well as participants in this hobby rather than being just people who have the hobby. In a way, we’re all people who share the hobby of collecting.

Many of the people who collect, collect just because they like having these things; I don’t have a specific reason for being a collector along those lines specifically, but I do collect stories. I’m not claiming to be too different from other people by saying this, but I don’t really have anything else that I am devoted to collecting. I mean I do have a bookshelf filled almost completely, but those are all because I’m interested in the stories. I remember the stories people tell me, like one of my friends who wants to go into modelling. Far be it for me to judge the stories of my friends and all the people I meet – in fact, I hope that the universe conspires to help her achieve her dreams, but I do enjoy listening to stories, reading them, telling them, and while strange, dreaming them.

The best thing about stories, the stories I collect, is that they exist in everything I touch. Sometimes I will forget a story, but I do remember most of them, and each one that I have I treasure; for example, I remember that I picked up the laser cel at the Anime club table at my university campus, I remember the girl signing up for the Chapters points program in line in front of me when I picked up one of my notebooks, I remember the game my friends bought me for my PSP as a birthday gift, I remember the day my brother got the PS3 as a birthday gift, I remember thinking that my mom got me a real cat, when she was talking about a statue, and I remember the experience of the handmade rosary around my neck right now. I remember stories and treasure them, and I don’t understand the sentimentality that goes behind it, but I realize now more than ever that I do understand what Dr. Orbinski means, and what many mean, when they say that “stories are all we have.” They really are. We may forget sometimes, but we’re human. As long as we treasure the stories around us, we will never lose our own story.

And whether your collection consists of paintings, insects, stamps, coins, or stories, as long as you do more than just collect, but actually transform the collection into something to share with the world, then I believe the story behind what you collect will never be lost.

I’m in Spaaaaaaaaaacceeeeee!

WHEEEE!

Lately, my life has been a little ridiculous. I recently finished Portal 2 (if you couldn’t tell by my title), and I had a conversation with a friend about how, as players, we project our latent feelings onto the character, Chell, who we play as. Throughout both of the Portal games, we are drawn into the role of a “test subject” who, as my friend (in RL and on Youtube) puts into song about LoZ’s Link, is a mute protagonist (see video below).

However, Chell is a mute protagonist beyond Link and other characters who never actually speak, since other characters have expectations. For Chell, all we know is that she is a character who tests and takes crap from GlaDOS. The fact that she does so without so much as a “stop it GlaDOS or I am going to kill you again!” is kind of cool, because it leaves so much to the imagination. You don’t get to see her reaction or what she is thinking, so it lets you do what you want with the character.

What the friend I had dinner with was telling me is that I have been projecting my feelings onto Chell as I played the game. (This part gets a bit spoiler-ish so read at your own risk, otherwise skip the rest of the paragraph.) From the way that we see Chell as a lonely character living the life of the typical everyman, to the way we seem to miss Wheatly for the period where he disappears, and the feeling we first get when GlaDOS incinerates our companion cube, the game never tells us anything – all of these feelings are derived from us, as the players of the game.

In a major way, this odd fact helped me realize the kind of person that I tend to be sometimes, and regardless of what our specific experiences, they seem to tell me one of two things; Chell is a mute everyman, doing these tests without expressing that she gives a fuck, and that we are (either secretly or openly) the kind of person we project onto Chell as we play.

Anyway, I guess that’s the end of that long rant. Hopefully I’ll be posting more frequently. For now though, enjoy a GIF and a video.

 

Visit Arisukiki: www.youtube.com/arisukiki

It’s About Time.

As a writer, I often get asked about what kind of writing I do. Usually, I just say “poetry” or “poetry and short fiction.” I’ve never actually given people a specific answer without asking them to first look at my writing. Then again, I tried to post poetry before telling you what I kind of poetry I was going to write. So I won’t post anything yet. I will let this serve as the introduction to who I am as a writer.

This is who I am. I know I probably look terrible, but I may as well get it out there. (I’ll get a better picture up eventually, I promise!!)

My story as a writer begins in first year university. That was 5 years ago. I began writing a fiction piece, in the hopes that it would result in a major springboard for my entry into the world of creative writing. I realize that I was absolutely wrong. It wasn’t for lack of talent though, but for lack of effort. Yeah, I did write, and I spent a lot of time doing so. But I wasn’t doing enough to get my stuff out there. That’s the big thing. So I kept trying. I entered the creative writing contest a few years in a row, and nothing really came out of it. I also took a creative writing course in poetry being taught by Michael Helm. That was a lot of fun, and I learned a lot, but I still wasn’t getting anywhere. It wasn’t until this past year when I really put writing at the top of my priority list. I don’t have a lot to say about it, but writing poetry and fiction are amazing experiences that have helped shape my mind.

One of the reasons I started this blog was to share my work. The other was to write about the world I experienced around me. There’s a common thread going through all the writing I do though. That is, I spend a lot of it thinking about the human experience, whether it’s mine or someone else’s or just generally. The things that I write are reflections on the way I see the world.

I don’t have much to say about what my writing is at the moment, but I would like to consider this a true starting point. I’ve introduced my work. Let the discussion begin.

Actually, There is Something I Want to Say

I was in 10th Grade when I first heard one of my favourite quotations, from one of my old friends. Little did I realize, that what he said that day would have such an important purpose in my life right now.

He said to me, “Do what you love, because in life that’s what you’ll do. Do what you do, and love will come to you.”

With Grad School Applications coming in paper piles at me, I realized that I’m still not 100% sure what I want to do with myself. I think there’s a part of me that wants to stay in Philosophy, but a part of me wants to pursue Creative Writing as well. I’ve applied to and will be applying to schools in both disciplines, but one of my major concerns is the fact that I don’t know where my heart lies.

Which do I love more? Which do I want to be? Which do I want to pursue for the rest of my life?

Obviously the answer is something only I can provide, but apart from that I think that the finality of this is something I’m making worse than it is. The very fact that I can still change my program (with a lot of effort) eliminates the “rest of my life” mentality, but the question still remains; where do I go from here?


Where Do I Go From Here? – Marié Digby

This is a song I can relate to because I’ve come to realize that I will never be able to plan out my life as neatly as other people have been able to. I do know that I will keep going, because unless I do, I will never find my answer. It’s the principle of the thing.

I don’t have to worry about deciding until I get all the offers for schools I apply for. That will be a decision on its own. I’m just going to give it a shot, applying to my top five, though, and from there, I will hopefully dig through this pile of paperwork.

Social Motivator: Society’s Motivation

I don’t want to sound judgmental here, but people need to chill. It’s 8:24 PM on the night of the Municipal Elections both here in Markham, and for our neighbours to the south, Toronto. Facebook basically looks like an anti-Ford hate center. Rob Ford was the candidate who won the office of Mayor for the city of Toronto, and people have shown themselves to dislike him a lot. The thing with politicians though, is that they are just people; more of us look worse than any of them than we’re willing to admit, and those of us that do act all “holier than thou” don’t bother acting on that fact. If you really think so poorly of a certain candidate, then why don’t you go run for office?

I don’t want to say that I care either way; I have my biases, but I’m going to be fair about the decision. Toronto’s voting public elected a Mayor, and his name is Rob Ford. He won by a landslide on the merits of his plans for the next few years, while he is in office. The things he’s done in the past may not have been good for his image, but despite the fact that he is a horrible person, there are people who are much worse than him, given much higher positions of government, and who have done a lot better on a much larger scale.

I hate to use this example, but Adolf Hitler, upon rising to power, did wonders for the world on an economic level. He may have had social issues, but Rob Ford certainly isn’t anywhere near him on that scale. There are a few things people need to realize about the election. First off, this is the way democracy works; the majority voted for one person, and that’s the person that represents the majority. If you don’t like it, that’s fine. Do I think it means you should leave the city? No, because that’s just irrational. Secondly, society will always look at the negatives of someone at the top. It’s what we did with George W. Bush. That man may have been raised by monkeys, but considering we didn’t give him the benefit of the doubt at all, it raises the question of whether we’re doing the same thing despite realizing the economic potential we have at this point. 

I say, this is the way the people voted, and you can disagree, but anything beyond an intellectual discussion about why you think someone else should have won, is just a waste of breath.

What Does Success Mean?

I recently heard the phrase “C Students in Life” (courtesy of Philip De Franco – video at the end) and was led to consider what it means to succeed in life. Now, De Franco describes a “C Student in Life” as someone who basically “half-asses their way to mediocrity"” and says he can’t respect someone like that. He raises an interesting point; life isn’t really worth anything, regardless of the end result, if you half ass your way through life, and end up not really earning it. This is the kind of thing that leads me to ask why people who work so hard end up living merely mediocre lives.

On the other hand, supposing you were born into, or undeservingly were given a great life, with money, people, and a myriad of happinesses, and you decided you wanted to work to earn it as an afterthought, or a thank you, by giving to charity, and helping people left and right, or opening your fortunes to the world (such as starting a software company, or, in a more abstract way, using your gift of a beautiful voice to sing and entertain people) then I can respect that.

I think in this same way, success has a lot to do with whether you’re grateful for where you are, or not, and how much you relate this gratefulness to that which you enjoy doing.

Via Philip De Franco (YouTube)

It looks like Autumn is finally starting to set in.

Has Anyone Else Noticed This?

Has anyone else noticed the fact that people at this time of year try to keep summer around as long as they can?

One of the biggest things is that people will try and make their lawns look greener than it ever was in the summer time. Oddly enough, it looks more like summer than it did in summer, in some places.

I think the true beauty of the seasons lies in the amazing colours of twilight – that’s when you can tell that it’s really autumn.

I have to say, the colours are absolutely a big part of the season for me, because it means that I get to take pictures of the world showing off. Even more than that though, I think autumn has helped me realize how much I wish it were summer still. I’ve done quite a lot of things with my friends despite it getting cold out, but I still want to do more with them.

View Full Album

My album consists of pictures from school, a trip downtown, Art Side Out, and other random things that happened in the past two months. The season’s not over yet, and Canada’s weather is completely unpredictable, but one of the things that often gets me moving and thinking about how opportune we are to be living where we do, and to get the chance to see the things that we do, no matter how small they are, is always a great time. If you’re interested, you can check out my other album, full of pictures taken of the autumn sky.

Cheers!

P.S. I’ll be blogging a lot more now, hopefully, because I think this is quite a relaxing hobby for me. If I don’t keep up, any of you are free to email and bug me to post something.